David Beers
In a remarkable column published in the NEW YORK TIMES, David Brooks writes from Nairobi Kenya , “Many Americans go to the developing world to serve others. A smaller percentage actually end up being useful. Those that do have often climbed a moral ladder. They start out with certain virtues but then develop more tenacious ones.
The first virtue they possess is courage, the willingness to go off to a strange place…
The second virtue they develop is deference, the willingness to listen and learn from the moral and intellectual storehouses of the people you are trying to help…
The greatest and most essential virtue is thanklessness, the ability to keep serving even when there are no evident rewards — no fame, no admiration, no gratitude..
[The] final virtue is what makes service in the developing world not just an adventure, a spiritual experience or a cinematic moment. It represents a noncontingent commitment to a specific place and purpose…people willing to embrace the perspectives and do the jobs the locals define…
David Brooks' entire column
I wish he’d write another column on usefully serving people in poverty here in this country. It might go something like this: Many Americans go to the soup kitchens, shelters, and streets of their cities to serve others. A smaller percentage actually end up being useful. Those that do have often climbed a moral ladder. They start out with certain virtues but then develop more tenacious ones.
The first virtue they possess is courage, the willingness to move out of their comfort zone and go to a place which serves people whose lives are very different from their own. They have moved beyond simply writing a check to getting personally involved.
The second virtue they develop is an awareness that they can’t map over from their own assumptions about how the world works to the lives of those they seek to serve, that the actions and attitudes of people in poverty arise from a different worldview than their own. This can lead to suspending judgment and seeking to understand what living in survival mode is actually like. One way to learn is through seminars such as Bridges Out of Poverty; another way to learn is to develop a relationship with someone who is living in poverty and listen with open ears, mind, and heart.
The third virtue they develop is a willingness to serve the other instead of helping or fixing. Rachel Naomi Remen writes, “Service rests on the basic premise that the nature of life is sacred, that life is a holy mystery which has an unknown purpose …When you help you see life as weak, when you fix, you see life as broken. When you serve, you see life as whole. From the perspective of service, we are all connected: All suffering is like my suffering and all joy is like my joy.” Serving is centered in relationship, not outcomes. It is soul work, not ego work. It is about you, not me; it is about your needs and dreams as you articulate them, not my solutions. It is about the wholeness and sacredness of life.
The fourth virtue they develop is persistence - a commitment to stay engaged for the long haul. There are few quick fixes for people wanting to move out of homelessness and poverty. It takes a long time for people to become homeless, and it takes at least as long (if not longer) for them to gain and attain economic stability. Effective people stay with the relationship, stay with the process, offering assistance and insistence / encouragement.
The fruits of all these virtues? Patience. Gratitude. Thanksgiving. Joy.
Blessings,
Paul A. Hanneman
Program Director
Urban Ministry Center
945 North College Street
Charlotte, North Carolina 28206
Our greatest need is to feel that we have value, are worthy, and can do beautiful things. Jean Vanier
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